The perfect career, relationship, home, family, body — you know, the “perfect” life — I used to think it actually existed. Yeah, I did. And that it could be mine if I just worked hard enough, dotted all the “i’s” and crossed all the “t’s.” Maybe someday I could get to “perfect.” But it doesn’t exist and that’s OK. Actually, it’s way better than OK. There’s no perfect, there’s just life.

It’s messy and hard and uncertain. A journey that’s full of sweet surprises. Little bits of wonder. Leaps of faith and simple pleasures. . . just life.

there-is-no-perfect-there's-just-lifeHere’s what I’ve learned about trying to be “perfect” — it means forever coming up short.

Never quite being “enough.”

Caught in a comparison trap, measuring myself against someone else who seems to have it all together. (At least that’s how it looks from the outside.)

And then there’s the Big Fat Bully in My Brain — the little voice that’s right there with the “Who do you think you are? What were you thinking?” stuff. Always there with the “shoulds,” the “can’ts” and the “nevers.”

For too long I tried to live up to impossible expectations. (My own and other people’s) Waited to be brave enough to just be me. Struggled to believe in myself and my dreams.

Sound familiar? You’re not alone. And there’s nothing wrong with you. Or me. With us. We just bought into the wrong message, that’s all.

It’s time to let go of chasing “perfect” and just live. Because right now we are enough. You and me. We can be our imperfect selves with no apologies, no shame, no guilt. And it’s OK.

There’s no perfect, there’s just life.

Think of all the ways you make a difference.

All the ways you bring smiles, laughter, and kindness into the world.

Just by being you.

It’s time to stop being so freakin’ hard on yourself. The Big Fat Bully in Your Brain wants to keep you playing small and scared by reminding you of all the times you’ve screwed up, been embarrassed, felt unsure, not been “perfect.” Yeah, that’s how the Bully operates.

I know . . .

Beat yourself up mentally long enough and it’s easy to give up.

You stop believing in your unique, awesome self and what you have to offer. 

A big piece of your soul and spirit dies.

You lose yourself.

You’re courageous enough to stop those nasty, negative Bully thoughts. You’re worth fighting for — so fight! When the Bully starts yapping, take a few deep breaths and remember all the ways you’re amazing. And valuable. Capable. Creative. And deserving.

Don’t tell me you’re not because I know you are. So do you, deep down inside. Don’t let the Bully win.

You’re brave enough to let the world see the real you. An incredible, amazing, one-of-a-kind woman who finds joy in little things. A woman who dares to dream. Goofs up. Struggles with fears. Starts over. Who can be serious and silly and strong. And maybe is still searching for the woman you were born to be. It’s all OK.

You’re brave enough to stop chasing perfect and be YOU!

There’s no perfect, there’s just life. So wrap yours in a great big hug and love who you are.


Bonnie Pond is an inspiring speaker and founder of the international Make Your Life Count Movement. She’s the author of The Power of Three: How to be Happy and Get What You Want in Life (Without Doing Anything Illegal, Immoral, or Unethical) and Unlock Your Creativity: 30 Days to a More Creative YOU! and self-described “Bahooda Kicker” who helps women stop settling for less than they really want in life. Her mission is to motivate women around the world to live their purpose, love their lives, and make them count.

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